“You’re too sensitive.”
“That never happened.”
“You’re remembering it wrong.”
These statements might seem harmless on the surface—but over time, they can become tools of a deeply damaging dynamic called gaslighting.
Gaslighting is a covert form of emotional manipulation where one person causes another to question their memory, instincts, and even reality. It’s confusing, disorienting, and—when unchecked—can wear down confidence, self-trust, and mental health. It can happen in romantic partnerships, friendships, families, and even in the workplace.
In our coaching work, we’ve walked alongside people on both sides of this dynamic:
✔️ Those who have been gaslighted and are working to rebuild their inner compass…
✔️ And those who, upon reflection, realize they’ve been gaslighting others—often without fully understanding the impact.
What Gaslighting Looks Like
Gaslighting isn’t always loud or obvious. It usually starts small—seeds of doubt, defensiveness, or dismissive comments.
Common tactics include:
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Denying things that really did happen (“I never said that.”)
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Minimizing your feelings (“You’re overreacting.”)
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Shifting blame (“You’re the one who started it.”)
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Making you feel like you’re the problem (“You’re crazy. You always do this.”)
Over time, you may:
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Constantly second-guess yourself
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Apologize even when you’re not sure why
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Feel anxious or “off” in your own skin
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Start relying on the other person to tell you what’s real
It doesn’t just affect your mind—it can impact your health. Chronic gaslighting spikes stress hormones, weakens your immune system, and can lead to anxiety, depression, or physical illness.
A Loving But Honest Question 💬
💡 What if you’re the one doing the gaslighting—and don’t even realize it?
Sometimes, gaslighting isn’t malicious. It can be a defense mechanism we picked up over time—used to protect our ego or avoid shame. But even if it’s unintentional, the effects on others are real.
Ask yourself:
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Do I minimize someone’s emotions when I feel uncomfortable?
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Do I avoid accountability by turning the tables?
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Have I ever made someone question their memory to avoid conflict?
Self-awareness is hard—but it’s how we grow. If this hits close to home, take it as an invitation. Not a condemnation.
Healing Starts With Awareness
Whether you’ve been gaslit or you’ve done the gaslighting, the first step is the same: awareness.
✨ If you’re on the receiving end, healing means rebuilding your voice and trusting yourself again.
✨ If you’ve been gaslighting, healing begins with accountability, curiosity, and unlearning old patterns.
At Discovery Coaching Group, we create space for both paths. We’re here for those looking to reclaim their power, restore healthy boundaries, and foster trust in themselves and others.
📩 Want to talk about it? Message us. Let’s start a conversation that could change everything.
You’re not crazy. You’re not alone. And you don’t have to stay stuck.
Let’s discover what’s next—together.
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